Wednesday, October 20, 2010

|艾分享| -- 世上没有丑女人,百分百女人怎么当?


100 rules to become a consummate lady


1. Teeth, as much any other feature, can make you look older than you really are. Look after them like you'd look after a mink coat.
2. Even Blair Waldorf has moved on from her hairband craze, so hello!
3. Of course, you're allowed to put your croc handbag on the floor, it's a bag not a baby.
4. Sweatsuits are strictly for the gym, don't wear them when you're not exercising. You're not Jenny-from-the-block.
5. Don't wear too many colours at one time because you're not a bag of Skittles.
6. Avoid exposing too much cleavage. What separates a lady from a tramp is knowing not to flaunt one's assets.
7. Cleanliness is the best perfume. There is no greater turn-off than a bad pong.
8. Never adjust or tug at your stockings in public. Even drag queens would never do that.
9. Never stinge on good shoes; $20 shoes last for 20 days... Make that 20 minutes.
10. Flaunting your designer bag does not show that you have desirably deep pockets, only a shallow personality. Class supercedes wealth anytime, honey!
11. A clutch is not an overnighter. Put in only the necessary.
12. Manners - the second best accessory. A well-mannered, ill-attired lady is preferable to a well-dressed, ill-mannered wannabe.
13. Forget Candace Bushell and her Sex and the City novels. Jane Austen still reigns as Queen Supreme of lady literature.
14. No mobile phone calls in the toilet. Think Jane Austen, not plain Jane.
15. Hot Milf Heidi Klum's glutes didn't get tight by people staring at them. She worked hard for them buns of steel - and so should you.
16. Learn from Parisian women, not Paris Hilton.
17. Taking three hours to doll up for an event is reserved for wannabes.
18. Who waits to be given diamonds these days? Kiss that passé thought goodbye and go get yourself some. They look more sparkly that way anyway! [就是啊,女人也能靠自己嘛!]
19. Avoid slutty behavior. Especially in the presence and company of handsome men.
20. Chanel was the first house to popularise costume jewellery so that's definitely a "yes" to that iconic Maltese-cross necklace you're eyeing.
21. Boyfriend watches are here to stay. We recommend an elegant dress watch like Hermes, 39mm Clipper,  pronto.
22. Never get drunk in public. Especially not on free bubbly.
23. If you're having a bad day at work, spritz yourself with a crisp scent. Those with green apple and cucumber are great for reducing anxiety.
24. You are no longer 18, don't dress like a teenager.
25. Contrary to popular belief, height does not lend confidence, plastic surgery does. Just kidding! We'd swap heels for ballet flats anytime.
26. Eat half of what's on your plate. Nothing says "cheap" quicker than a well-polished dish.
27. Cold showers aren't just for testosterone-ridden teenage boys. Having one in the morning (we mean the cold shower) increases mental alertness and adds a toning effect to your face.
28. Always check in the mirror to make sure nothing is see-through.
29. We agree with Kimora Lee Simmons that, "bootleg is faux fabulous." Like uh-huh...
30. Always wear clean. nice undies. You never know when your modesty may be compromised by unfortunate circumstances.
31. Boost your latest diet with vitamin D supplements. Women deficient in it lost weight more slowly in a study in the British Journal of Nutrition.
32. Never insult anyone. That's stooping too low and vulgar.
33. Chocolates are loaded with antioxidants and leave you in an extremely good mood. So, go on and indulge.
34. Don't try to fit into a slinky Herve Leger number if you're shaped like Khloe Kardashian. She looks like she could hurt somebody if that zip pops.
35. If you can't afford Balmain, just don't buy it.
36. Love your body, yes, but if a cropped top is going to make you look like Winnie The Pooh...Hel-LO, you'll be ugly!
37. Try sleeping on your back instead of your side. This prevents puffiness and wrinkles from forming on the side of the face you are sleeping on.
38. Quit expressing yourself through your slogan T-shirt. It's so 2009.
39. Nails should always be buffed, cleaned and manicured. No kawaii-inspired Jolin Tsai nails if you want to keep Jay Chou by your side. [哈哈,真的吗?蔡依林也中招?!]
40. Who says ladies are tech-dumb? Classy chicks choose only the Asus N Series notebook for it's sleek style and sound, thanks to its SonicMaster feature developed in tandem with Bang & Olufsen.
41. Fishnet are for strippers and fishermen. Enough said.
42. We choose silk over synthetics any day.
43. Having trouble snoozing? Don't play games on your iPhone before bedtime. Studies have shown that cellphone use keeps you from falling into deep sleep. [iPhone使用者,小心哦!]
44. Start a whitening regimen and stick to it. An uneven skin tone can add 10 to 15 years to your appearance and you don't want that, or do you?
45. There's a reason it's called the schoolgirl look: If you're over 26, wear this only in the bedroom. 
46. Pick up a new sport because it keeps you slim, fit and improves your learning and comprehension.
47. Just how much fragrance can you wear before colleagues start holding their breath around you? The rule of thumb is one to two drops or three to four spritzes. Scented bath toiletries give the most subtle, sensual skin scent.
48. Buying a bra one size smaller won't give you Allessandra Ambrosia's cleavage. Trust us, we've tried.
49. Need a confidence-booster? Wear a gutsy lipstick colour such as fuchsia, tangerine and deep burgundy.
50. Don't blame that top-drawer face cream for failing to work. It could be your fault for not exfoliating!
51. You'll never really experience the world till you've travelled.
52. Sorry darlings, if God made you Asian, bleaching your hair blonde does not change your race or make you Marilyn Monroe.
53. It's a woman's prerogative to change her mind. Especially when she has a watch with interchangeable bezels and straps for a completely different look.
54. Ageing gracefully... Is there such a thing? We advocate botox and fillers, anytime.
55. Body scrubs are just as crucial as facial scrubs. Indulge in a body scrub once a month at least to avoid the " crocodile-skin" syndrome.
56. Bandages do not belong on a dress but in a first-aid kit. Buy yourself a real one-piece wonder instead.
57. Unless you're Victoria Beckham or blind, never wear sunglasses indoors. Not cool, girlfriend.
58. You should know this by now: Copping a head-to-toe runway look does not buy you class. Or style.
59. Gladiator sandals belonged to 2008 and ancient Rome, so just stop it now. Capisci?
60. Just say no to fake Louis Vuitton. Same goes for all other noted brands: From Chanel to Hermes, Gucci and everyhing in-between.
61. A moustache on a lady is so wrong. That's like eating rubbish from a Tiffany & Co silver spoon.
62. We just can't believe that some of you still wear ankle bracelets - and worse, wear them under pantyhose. There should be a $10,000 fine for people like you.
63. Never deprive your neck and decolletage of sunblock. Skin in these areas has a lower cell-turnover rate, which means spots are harder to eliminate.
64. For sure you can mix high-street with designer. If the City's Olivia Palermo can do it with paneche, so can you.
65. Retreat with a purr to W Retreat Koh Samui. One look at its luxurious villas and you won't be sorry you left your Blackberry behind.
66. Gaga and Aguilera got nothin' on Madonna, so get her Immaculate Collection at the very lease. All hail the Queen!
67. A classic example of trash vs class: Showing butt cleavage as opposed to classier, subtler boob cleavage.
68. Beige is a beautiful colour, so embrace it.
69. Add even more spring to your step with the scent of peppermint. It makes you feel more awake, alive and raring to go.
70. Letting him run his fingers through your hair starts with putting your trust in a good conditioner, my dears.
71. Jeans, pearls and anything Hermes never go out of style.
72. Act like a lady: Cross your legs at the ankles. Never belch or pass gas, even when you think you're alone. And no swearing.
73. Shop with your husband only if he's paying for it.
74. Only call yourself the Duchess if you have blue blood.
75. "Ugg" is short for ugly, geddit?
76. High hair like Snooki's pouf should only be the hairstyle-of-the-day at a pet groomer's.
77. Channelling Katy Perry is a huge fashion don't. Costumes are not real clothes.
78. Don't be shy to Spanx. Like Lycra, it's ne of fashion's best inventions ever - word!
79. Colouring your hair every once in a while has been proven to boost confidence at work. This included giving you the courage to ask for that raise you deserve.
80. Gold, leopard-print and a Celine wardrobe are every modern lady's fashion must-haves.
81. It's almost the end of 2010 so please return Boy George his shoulder pads. Dear Rihanna, we are talking to you.
82. Leggings are for ballerinas and jeggings are just bananas.
83. Frizzy hair looks good only if you're born with it. Smooth down wiry, fried tresses with a good Kerastase conditioner.
84. Why settle for pretty when you can get pretty smart? The gorgeous Link Chronograph ladies' watch by TAG Heuer proves the point.
85. Take a well-deserved break at the newly launched Wanderlust. Its ultra-hip and uber-chic factors make it perfect for a staycation.
86. Blogging fashion fluff does not make you fashionable. If you want to be taken seriously, nurture a voice and writing style as credible as an industry pro's.
87. Salvador Dali may have said, " those who do not want to imitate anything, produce nothing," but we believe you should still have your own style.
88. Invest in a good blusher. Peachy or tawny blushes deliver a more natural and youthful glow than pink blushes.
89. Trust us when we say there's nothing more reassuring that a chain with lots of diamonds at the end of it.
90. Start taking antioxidants seriously to prevent premature skin ageing. Look upon your tomato salad as unit trusts for your future, and slather your skin with antioxidant skincare.
91. Never leave home without sunblock. Enough said.
92. We maintain that Jessica Alba is "wow" and Jessica Simpson is " whoops".
93. Try try tai chi, yoga or brisk walking because studies have shown that repetitive activities revolving around deep breathing and rhythm are best for triggering the body's relaxation response.
94. Trust us, black eyeliners are ubiquitous, but light beige eyeliner can help you fake eight hours' sleep.
95. It's not just about the white T-shirt, but any colour, really. A good quality cotton tee is every girl's (and boy's) fashion staple. Who's to say that you own "too many"?
96. Like with diamonds, never stinge on quality when it comes to your skincare. Always buy the best that you can afford. After all, your face is your best investment.
97. You want sex on legs? We say: Dolce & Gabbana.
98. A greasy nose is simply impolite. Keep shine at bay by touching up with a good, colourless blotting powder.
99. For perennially glowing skin, use a face mask every three days, but make sure that it suits your skin type. Which means that you'kk have to stop stealing your mum's anti-wrinkle one if you have acne-prone skin.
100. To all the Misses-know-it-all, dropping names only looks good if you know who and what you're talking about.

Credit to 《style:》 magazine, 100th issue

然后又让人发出 -_-!! 的表情。




  1. vivi, u type all sentences ar....
    so good....thanks a lot ya~ ^^

  2. Ya...seems tat i m abit too free...ahahah

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